Conscious uncoupling; the right way to split.

Conscious uncoupling; the right way to split. Conscious uncoupling is the right way to split. My readers may have believed I had a conscious uncoupling with them. I apologize. There is nothing else I can say, about my lack of articles or writing. However, I am back. I really want to write about conscious uncoupling. What a great idea. Doesn’t everyone benefit when separating partners make a concerted effort to have a grown-up, non-antagonistic split or divorce? Rather than waste time and money on not getting along, that same time and money are spent on getting along. The world would be a better place. Forgiveness is key to conscious uncoupling. Recognizing that everyone is human and doing their best, however, childish their actions may be is very empowering. The problem is that conscious uncoupling requires two mature adults. It is difficult at best to be mature when one’s heart is breaking. Maybe only the difficult breakups find their way to my desk. Several of the partners I have met acted like 14-year-olds. So what does one do? As difficult as it is, you take the high road. However, when you take the high road you always feel good about it. Modern technology is your friend in conscious uncoupling. I suggest the following steps: 1). Block your ex’s number from your phone- this will block phone calls and text messages. 2). Remove all pictures of the two of you. 3). Block all of his social media. Remember, the old saying out of sight out of mind. That saying is very applicable here. The Journal of Neurophysiology reports that seeing photographs of one’s ex-stimulated the areas of the brain that control motivation, rewards, cravings and addiction. Those are very powerful forces. The desire to reconcile is the strongest around 6 to 8 weeks after a breakup. This might be the best time go on vacation. Another conscious uncoupling tip is to think positive. The Journal of Positive Psychology conducted a study where one group of participants wrote about the positive aspects of past relationships and the other group wrote about the negative aspects of past relationships. The positive group reported feeling more empowered, energetic, thankful and satisfied. Alexandra Katehakis, M.F.T. wrote in the Huffington Post, be kind to yourself and your ex. She further states, be compassionate to your ex rather than invoking revenge, spite or fear. This may not be your easiest choice. However, it is ultimately the one emotion that can see you safely through conscious uncoupling. The first famous uncoupling couple was Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin. Paltrow stated, "The idea is to stay married. But if you can't stay married, wouldn't the ideal be that you could still be a family and you could put aside your own stuff long enough to explore — what is this new family and who am I in it?" Paltrow explained. "And Chris is a great ex-husband 'cause he's a very, very willing partner in how to do that. We're constantly putting aside our own stuff and trying to re-imagine something that we don't personally have an example for." They are a true example of how conscious uncoupling benefits everyone. More articles conscious uncoupling in the near future. Please refer to past articles on forgiveness and relationships. Posted by Kimberley Kellogg at 6:09 PM